Things go sideways

When I saw ATK’s episode on prosciutto bread, it looked fabulous. Want want want!

But here’s the thing. I can easily acquire bread flour, but 1/4 inch thick prosciutto, salami, pepperoni and provolone require an actual stop at a deli counter. In the days of COVID, that’s not remotely a thing.

Well, I know the right thing is to make the recipe exactly before tweaking, but … I’m sure we can work with it, right? Thick-sliced deli options will have to do in lieu of the chunk versions.

Well maybe that’s okay. But the other key thing was they used a stand mixer with a dough hook.

I do not own a stand mixer.

Let alone one with a dough hook.

I could get one but literally every time I have considered it, I have realized that for how often I’d really use it (not even to mention the space to store it) that would be so wasteful.

This is not a need. I mean seriously. For my life, in no way that would be worthwhile.

But it’s kind of called for in this recipe.

Do you know how much hand-kneading you have to do for the same results as 8 minutes with a dough hook on a stand mixer?

That’s a question. I don’t know the answer.

Far more than I did, anyway. It didn’t rise enough, in either rise.

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As it cools, I’m sneezy. All this pollen has given me a cough that seems superficially worrying in a pandemic (vaccinated, allergies, am fine!) and now the pepper hanging in the air is triggering a general sneeziness. If I didn’t know better I’d be worried about myself.

But the more maddening thing is that my house smells delicious. Between reheating the pepper sauce from Cameroon and now this, my kitchen is wafting utter deliciousness to a maddening degree.

So, okay.

Sure, the smell is amazing, and it looks okay… but how did it really turn out?

Pause for thorough cooling

A bit denser than hoped for. See previous comment about lack of rising. All the cheese and meat ensures it still tastes good, but it’s texturally underwhelming.

Good enough to eat, anyway.

Well, adventures were pursued. And a little prosciutto bread seemed like a good dish to go with beginning the Conqueror challenge for …

Big reveal!

… St Francis Way.

Synchronous!